


Too Damn Early

by Spiggips



Category: Thor (2011)
Genre: Community: norsekink, Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-13
Updated: 2012-06-13
Packaged: 2017-11-07 15:53:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/432868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spiggips/pseuds/Spiggips
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which the All-Father feigns a rather convenient Odin-Sleep.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too Damn Early

**Author's Note:**

> (De-anon and some minor revision.) Originally written for [this prompt](http://norsekink.livejournal.com/3415.html?thread=9282647#t9282647) over at NorseKink.

Odin whistled to himself as he made his way across the Bifrost. It was still early in the morning and so the only other person around was Heimdall. Unlike his beloved wife, Odin knew the guardian wouldn't object to this little errand.

"Another gift, my Lord," Heimdall inquired, with a knowing grin.

"Of course," Odin answered.

"My Lord is most charitable. It is little wonder where Prince Thor acquired his love of Midgard."

Odin returned the comment with his own little smirk as Heimdall activated the bridge. The small stool the All-Father held at his side was missing two legs and probably housed a few termites. It had long out-lived it's usefulness and was in need of a new home.

"Odin!"

Drat.

Odin turned to face his glowering wife, strategically concealing the brittle piece of furniture behind his back. "Ah, my beloved-"

"Don't 'beloved' me, old man," Frigga scolded as she marched towards the two men. Odin actually flinched. Heimdall, meanwhile, was making a valiant effort at blending in with the the observatory's golden backdrop. 

"What do you think you are doing with that," she demanded.

"Doing with what, my dea-"

"That stool! Honestly, Odin, you cannot simply banish all your garbage to Midgard."

"It is not garbage," Odin argued, "It's charity! The mortals liked Thor, didn't they?"

"Mm-hm. I'm sure they're just _delighted_ with Jormungandr, too."

"Those whales were becoming a nuisance! I did them a favor!"

Voices were being raised and Heimdall had disappeared completely. Smart man.

"Honestly, you march around here in your shining armor, as if you own-"

"I _do_ own! I am the Ki-"

"That does not excuse you from-"

"HRAW-"

"DON'T YOU 'HRAWR' ME, _ODIN BORSON_. I CAN YELL JUST AS LOUDLY AS-"

It was no use. Odin was not in the mood for this, least not this early in the morning.

Frigga was about to make another loud point when Odin decided he was still sleepy enough to pull off a convincing faint.

Collapsing to the ground, he could still vaguely hear Frigga gasp, followed by the threat of going into a convenient Frigga-Sleep the next time the All-Father was feeling frisky.


End file.
